Oh, so hot.

I bought this most excellent shirt at Wal-Mart. It’s got a heart with flames on the top and icecicles on the bottom and a switch set to “hot” on the heart. I threw it on today with a suitcoat that I dug out of my closet. (Don’t know where or when I got it, but it was black, and thanks to low-carbing it, it fits!) I also wore my newer light blue jeans and personally I thought I looked killer!!!

What you think. Do I look hot? Or is it just a Justin thing? 🙂

FANTASTIC FREE Bible Study Software!!

I just discovered this today. E-Sword http://www.e-sword.net/ is an extremely powerful Bible study software. As a user of the logos software for years, I can honestly say that this has almost all of the features at none of the price. Check it out. You’ll love it!!

With this recent revelation of being the “bride of Christ” God has now been working on me in my prayer life in the matter of consistency, and again how I approach him. It used to be I would somehow correlate my security in the effect of my prayers with how “hard” I prayed them. Mind you, I never, ever, get worried or depressed when I pray. That’s NOT what I’m talking about. I’m talking about the constant, almost beating of a prayer until I was sure it would be answered either my way, or if not, that it would be God’s will regardless. I still don’t have any concrete thoughts on this (after all, Jesus sweated blood at the garden, and “the effectual, fervent prayer of a rightous man effects much”), but I am wondering tonight if maybe it is the obedience combined with faith that is the powerful part of prayer? But then again, those “feelings” of just knowing God’s going to come through also sometimes produce the same emotions that get me excitedly riled up in prayer anyway. So really, maybe it’s not how it looks or feels, but probably whether the look and feeling is the result of, or the means to that powerful prayer? I guess in that case as long as the goal is that powerful assurance of faith when we pray it doesn’t matter anyway. Whether we start there or work up to there, the goal is achieved the same way.

This is why you don’t download Bible software for an hour and then write a blog at 3:25a.m. lol.

God bless you all!

Missions Trip, New Revelation

Hey all,

I’m heading out to Mexico on April 5 – 15. It is the first time I have been back since my first life-changing missions trip to Mexico 3 years ago. I am PUMPED!!

This time, I don’t have the money to do it myself. And so I decided to try the “fundraising” thing. It has truly been an incredible blessing to see people donate money to my trip. I have gotten money from clients, friends, and even friends of my parents including one that I’ve never met(!) How cool! I was concerned I was being reckless with my finances by doing deciding on going, but I guess God has seen it as wisdom to ask others for help. Right now it looks like I will be just fine, despite the taxes I’m paying in.

In other news, I posted a while ago about the life-changing revelation God gave me a month or two back about being the “Bride of Christ”. I am still living in the newness of that, and I have also found that my mentality at times does not line up with it. I suppose whenever God brings us closer, we have some habits and thought patterns of the past that we need to re-align to the newly revealed (to us) truth. This is what the Bible calls the “renewing of our mind.”

God bless all who read this.

Roller Coaster

So yesterday I just felt terrible. Thank God for young adult group tonight!! God really showed up!!

Yesterday I was feeling really powerless over my own sin, worthless, even wondering if God still loved me. And last night I had an immoral dream to top it all off. I don’t know why or how it happened, but it was demonic. Maybe it was in response to the revelation I had gotten about myself as the “Bride of Christ”, (as the Bible says). I don’t know, all I know is that I was attacked, and God let me go through it. And now he has refreshed me, and I feel back on track.

But that’s probably the point. I need to not rely on feelings AT ALL when it comes to my personal identity. It does seem, however, that God will continually let us get to the breaking point, only to refresh us again. I know He does it to bring forth and break the lies and insecurities that we believe and have, as well as to make us stronger in trust of Him, as well as probably another million reasons.

The thing that struck me most tonight from young adults group was what Les said about Jesus asking Peter 3 times if he loved Him. The last time Peter was hurt and said, “Lord, you know I love you”. That’s right. God DID know that he loved him. And he gave Peter the opportunity to have his own heart revealed and confirmed to himself. Remember, Peter once denied Jesus openly 3 times. God out of his love gave him a chance to reaffirm his faith in Him 3 times. And even though Peter was hurt that He asked- it was a painful thing to go through for many reasons and I’m sure he questioned his own worth and salvation at that point- even though all of this happened Christ never knew Peter as anything but a rock. Amazing. Like Les said tonight, it’s ok to have pain and emotional struggle in the Christian walk. In fact, it’s healthy!! Jesus didn’t enjoy the cross!! He cried out of frustration! (John 11:35) John the Baptist didn’t even know who the Savior was until the Spirit rested on Jesus (his cousin!), and then he questioned himself and his life’s ministry from prison. (Again, Jesus was loving enough to give him an answer to let him die in peace). And Peter!! THANK GOD FOR PETER!!!! lol!!

God has been setting me up this year. I can see it happening. He is setting me free. Loosing me from fear and strengthening my faith and most importantly, my love relationship with Him.

Thank you, Love.