I miss Jess.

I miss her happiness.
I miss her friendship.
I just miss her. Not as a girlfriend, but just as a friend.
If you read this, (507) 202-0715.

Today’s list…

I’m starting to make lists in the morning. Think it’s of God.

Today’s list: Things I love about Shane Clairborne…

1. He has challenged me to live a life of faith far more than anyone in recent times.
2. He actually lives what he believes.
3. He isn’t afraid to die.
4. He has challenged my allegiances to America, the Republican party, “just war”, etc.
5. He has inspired me to see the God-character inherent in every person.
6. He has re-shown me the incredible value of community and relationships.
7. He looks more like the church in Acts 2 then what I’ve seen anywhere else.

Read: The Irresistible Revolution. It’s cheap and incredible.

The seeds of revolution…

I’m watching the latest Les Miserables (with Liam Nieson) and it really does a better job of showing the seeds of why the citizens fought for revolution than the version with Anthony Perkins. Although I think that Anthony Perkins makes a better Valjean.

See them both! 🙂



It truly isn’t about numbers for me anymore.

It used to be. I used to dream about playing for huge crowds of people in a rock band. It is a dream I’ve had since I was a little kid. (I believe it maybe that idea is of God, but that’s another story.) Back then the numbers meant how many people would look at me in respect and admiration. I would be a god to them.

For a while, after I became Christian, I thought about how cool I would look, AND how I could show the world the quality of music that is deserving of the name of Christ.

Then, I envisioned the sheer number of people I could impact for Christ and inspire in ministry as a model. Wouldn’t God be impressed with my work!?!!!!

Now I’m at a new place. A place I truly believe is more Christ’s heart than I’ve ever been at before. The place where life is all about relationships, and where numbers have no meaning. The place where if I don’t have good relationships, it doesn’t matter if I’m playing for 500,000 people- it’s just pointless. To God, and to me.

God has put the immeasurable treasure of Himself in part in each of us. It is a privilege to hang out with another human and see those intangible, beautiful aspects of personality, character, and giftings come out as we enjoy finding Christ in each other. I see God both in Christians and non-Christians (after all, we’re ALL created in His image!). My hope is that all I have relationship with will be restored to their maker, but I know that without love and realtionship nothing in life matters. And so I do not love with an agenda. I do not play in a band with an agenda. I love. Period. Faulty at times. Utterly failing at others. But my goal in life and my focus is on Jesus and is on filling myself with His love so I can truly love others.

God cares about quality before quantity. It is so funny to see Him move in my life in areas I’ve asked him to do for years- only now I don’t care about anymore. I believe sometimes we just aren’t ready for the desires He’s put on our heart until we have our heart and mind changed into a vessel that can handle them.

God- I’m an open book. Use me how You see fit, but just give me GREAT relationships with You and with everyone I come into contact with!!!!


The world is clammering over power, wealth, and notoriety. But all of the previous are crap to God. And you can never handle them as a Christian unless you are willing to lay them all down for the sake of relationship.

Bible Study Notes

Thinking and reading a lot about Jesus’ kingdom of God parables in Matthew 13. Especially for some reason about the idea of the soil or the field. Noticing a few things in all those parables. Main things are who is doing the actions and what the symbolism is. First parable is about the farmer planting seed in the field. Jesus explained that one.

Jesus explained a few parables, and then didn’t. Teaching the disciples to connect the dots and figure them out for themselves.

V. 31-34 (Parable of mustard seed). Note how he talks about how kingdom of God is sown in the field by a man. Field = men’s hearts (see first parable in Matthew 13). Man = Son of Man (See Jesus explanation of the parable of the man sowing good seeds and enemy sowing evil seeds in v. 24-30).

Interesting, in v. 33 he switches and starts talking about a woman sowing the kingdom in bread like yeast. Why a woman? Who is this? My guess is that is it us, the bride of Christ.

Then in 44 he talks about kingdom being like a treasure hidden in a field (hearts of men). Again, when a MAN found it (Son of man?), he hid it again and sold everything he had to buy the field. Sounds a lot like Jesus to me!

V. 45-46. This time, talking about a merchant looking for a pearl. Who is that merchant??? When this merchant found it he sold everything he had and bought that pearl.

V. 47-50. Kingdom like a merchant let into a lake to catch all kinds of fish. When full, fisherman pulled it up on shore. Collected good fish in baskets, threw the bad away. He says this is how it will be at the end of the age. Angels will come and separate righeous and wicked.

Then Jesus asks something, “Have you understood all of these things?” He was teaching them. Teaching them to think and to examine and interpret. They needed to see through His eyes to do it, and needed his revelation, but there was a lot to be gained from doing the math.

Ends the chapter with something curious “Therefore every teacher of the law who has been instructed in the kingdom of heaven is like a house owner who brings out of his storeroom treasures old and new. Many more “key words” in this. Who are the teachers? How have they been instructed? Who is the house owner? What is the storeroom? The word treasure is used in a second parable.

No firm incredible revelations as of yet. Just exploring this.